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Full Version: Rectal Feeding: A CIA carol
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In celebration of Langley's felicitous redefinition of the phrase "Yuletide Log," songsmith Michael Fleming has reworked an old favourite for your seasonal satisfaction:

A CIA Christmas: 12 Days of Torture

[video=youtube_share;u9-xz0C5nkQ]http://youtu.be/u9-xz0C5nkQ[/video]

After three:

Quote:On the first day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
A session of waterboarding

On the second day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the third day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the fourth day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the fifth day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the sixth day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Six facial holds
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the seventh day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Seven slaps and insults
Six facial holds
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the eighth day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Eight stress positions
Seven slaps and insults
Six facial holds
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the ninth day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Nine clothes-a-stripping
Eight stress positions
Seven slaps and insults
Six facial holds
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the tenth day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Ten sleep deprivations
Nine clothes-a-stripping
Eight stress positions
Seven slaps and insults
Six facial holds
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the eleventh day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
Eleven heads-a-walling
Ten sleep deprivations
Nine clothes-a-stripping
Eight stress positions
Seven slaps and insults
Six facial holds
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and a session of waterboarding

On the twelfth day of torture
The CIA gave to me:
12 times-a-beating
Eleven heads-a-walling
Ten sleep deprivations
Nine clothes-a-stripping
Eight stress positions
Seven slaps and insults
Six facial holds
Five rectal feedings
Four cramped confinements
Three attention grasps
Two abdominal slaps
and they still can't catch a terrorist
Our first contender:

[video=youtube_share;K5_1-x7UFUg]http://youtu.be/K5_1-x7UFUg[/video]
If the CIA are smart they'd copyright their innovative treatments from Gitmo and elsewhere and in future sell them as a franchise package.

I can see rectal feeding and associated treatments soon becoming a popular addition to health spa treatments. The commercial opportunities are endless. A combined rectal feeding & face mud pack treatment, followed by a soothing swim in golden spa waters. It brings a new meaning to facials. And instead of taking a hot sauna followed by a healthy whipping with birch branches, use hose pipe lengths instead.
David Guyatt Wrote:I can see rectal feeding and associated treatments soon becoming a popular addition to health spa treatments. The commercial opportunities are endless. A combined rectal feeding & face mud pack treatment, followed by a soothing swim in golden spa waters. It brings a new meaning to facials. And instead of taking a hot sauna followed by a healthy whipping with birch branches, use hose pipe lengths instead.
Golden showers and colonic irrigation?
Paul Rigby Wrote:Our first contender:

[video=youtube_share;K5_1-x7UFUg]http://youtu.be/K5_1-x7UFUg[/video]

Contender the second (wordless): music to get interrogated by, perhaps at your local corner torture shop

SADO MASODUBOriginal Mix
ARTISTSPERC, EINSTÃœRZENDE NEUBAUTEN

http://www.beatport.com/track/sado-masod...ix/4801896
Magda Hassan Wrote:
David Guyatt Wrote:I can see rectal feeding and associated treatments soon becoming a popular addition to health spa treatments. The commercial opportunities are endless. A combined rectal feeding & face mud pack treatment, followed by a soothing swim in golden spa waters. It brings a new meaning to facials. And instead of taking a hot sauna followed by a healthy whipping with birch branches, use hose pipe lengths instead.
Golden showers and colonic irrigation?

Now there's a thought? ::laughingdog::
Are American securocrats increasingly obsessed with attacking our bottoms?

It would appear so, as yet more compelling evidence emerges of this weird predilection:

GEORGIA VIPER UNIT ACCUSED OF ILLEGAL STRIP SEARCHES
Published: December 23, 2014


http://www.blacklistednews.com/Georgia_V...um=twitter

Quote:Now we know what those TSA organized "VIPER" teams are doing since being tasked to patrol the streets of America, namely the same as they do at our nation's airports -- organized mass molestation on an unprecedented scale.

In this case out of Georgia, a VIPER team composed of officers from the Forest Park Police Department has been accused by a plurality of victims of conducting illegal strip searches, allegedly telling one suspect to "pull his pants down, bend over, squat and cough."

Some of the strip searches were so disturbing they reportedly ended in tears.

The accused "crimes"? Such horrors as driving with "expired tags," or allegedly "not using a turn signal."

Others say the Georgia VIPER team broke into their home in the middle of the night without a warrant, arrested them, then went through their personal belongings like they were going through a "pawn shop" taking whatever they pleased.

Their victims are now fighting back with a lawsuit accusing the VIPER teams of violating their rights.

"Taking somebody's clothes off on the side of a road someplace, pulling their pants down, exposing their genitals, searching them without probable cause or a warrant, it's just not lawful," said representing attorney Mark Bullman.

Watch a video report on case courtesy of WSBTV.

Bend, cough and squat - the future for America's terrified people?
David Guyatt Wrote:If the CIA are smart they'd copyright their innovative treatments from Gitmo and elsewhere and in future sell them as a franchise package.

I can see rectal feeding and associated treatments soon becoming a popular addition to health spa treatments. The commercial opportunities are endless. A combined rectal feeding & face mud pack treatment, followed by a soothing swim in golden spa waters. It brings a new meaning to facials. And instead of taking a hot sauna followed by a healthy whipping with birch branches, use hose pipe lengths instead.

It only requires the right marketing campaign. And I'm totally serious. Most Americans will buy ANYTHING if it's advertised in the right way. Especially if they think it's the latest cool thing that everyone else is doing.