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The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - Printable Version

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The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - David Guyatt - 15-03-2009

Our Father (who art English) Who art in (Chelsea) Heaven,
Hallowed be thy English name (not Da, Pere, Padre, Vater, Pa, Pop or other abominations).
Thy English Kingdom Come (past tense),
Thy English Will Be Done (obviously),
On Blighty Earth as it is in (beach towel holiday) Heaven.

Give us this day our Anglo-Saxon bread (the very best there is).
And forgive us our foreign trespasses (but you really need understand why we trespass, oh English Lord),
As we forgive them who trespass against us (but thankfully not very bloody often).
And lead us not into temptation (we are English after all),
But deliver us from Evil (if you really feel you must).
For Thine is the United Kingdom, the Power and the Blighty Glory,
For ever and ever (and a little longer in case of greed).
Amen.

PS, I’ve never understood Lord, why You require a single Egyptian word “Amen” to thrive in Your native language when “it will be so,” or “and so it will be” or “let it be donee” or any number of other English equivalents would do so much better.

What have the Egyptians ever done for us?


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - Damien Lloyd - 15-03-2009

David Guyatt Wrote:What have the Egyptians ever done for us?

Nothing.. Well apart from that heretic pharoah who abolished the state religion harmonising the three personalities of Ra (one of which was Amen Ra, the personification of breath as life, or the literal word of God) into one god Aten. Soon after his sons death Aten worshipers are not mentioned. But a few generations later Israel is documented by the egyptians for the first time. But apart from creating our religion, and nice triangles in the desert and inspiring many cults and secret societies... Nothing


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - David Guyatt - 16-03-2009

Well, okay, but apart from that what have the Egyptians ever done for us?


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - Damien Lloyd - 16-03-2009

David Guyatt Wrote:Well, okay, but apart from that what have the Egyptians ever done for us?

Ooh, lightbulbs powered by electric batteries that used citrus juice.


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - David Guyatt - 17-03-2009

Twister! It was the Galilee People's Front who first came up with light bulbs powered by lemon juiced batteries.


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - Damien Lloyd - 17-03-2009

David Guyatt Wrote:Twister! It was the Galilee People's Front who first came up with light bulbs powered by lemon juiced batteries.


Galilean Peoples Front???



SPLITTERS


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - David Guyatt - 18-03-2009

Well yes, I made that one up. But only that one. And only to see if you were paying attention (he said slyly).

But apart from that - and the lemon juice battery powered light bulbs; and those nice triangles in the desert; and, of course, being the father of Christian religion; and secret societies, and painting funny pictures sideways on, what have the Egyptian ever done for us?

And okay, I know they first invented black ink, I'll grant you that. And the 365 day calendar and Leap year. And sails for boats.

And they did do a nice line in cartouches I have to admit. And had many spells, hymns and other methods for easing the soul through the afterlife. But you can't buy a MacDonald's with a hymn or a spell can you?

So the original question stands.


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - David Guyatt - 18-03-2009

Oh, all right then. Egyptians rock.

[Image: ancient_egyptian_music.jpg]


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - David Healy - 18-03-2009

David Guyatt Wrote:Oh, all right then. Egyptians rock.

LMAO! All the pic is needs is a Willie Nelson CD at the feet of the guitarist...


The Lord's Prayer - English obviously - Damien Lloyd - 18-03-2009

David Guyatt Wrote:Oh, all right then. Egyptians rock.


LMAO, thats brilliant.

My mum has always loved anything Egyptian. When I was 25 I got my first tatoo. I chose an Eye of Horus for my chest in the hope that my mum wouldn't beat me so bad when she found out that my cut was something she liked...


It didn't work.