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  1. David Guyatt's Avatar


    Hosni Sadat Blair Ibn Obama

    “If I go now there will be chaos”

    President Hosni Anwar Blair Ibn Obama, riding his camel in “Lawrence” style along Pennsylvania Avenue, told reporters that if he were to bow to pressure from bilious citizens in Egypt, and leave office, galactic chaos would result.

    After years of public office, he said “I am fed up. I’ve nearly accrued enough. I want to go”.

    Speaking at a heavily guarded camel park and burger fair, the eccentric Libyan leader said he must resist calls to leave on this, the “day of departure”, until he receives word from his Swiss bankers that he can depart following an orderly transfer.

    “Well, several transfers actually”, the Jordanian king sighed with a catlike grin.

    Obama blamed the Republican Brotherhood for the violence that has erupted. “I had nothing to do with it. I was in my counting house, counting up my money”.

    The president’s comments came on a day when his hand-picked vice president Ben Ali Biden returned from a fact finding visit to Liberation House in New Orleans. Asked about his visit, VP Ben Biden said “very satisfying”.

    “What is needed now” Ben Biden said, “is an orderly transition to power”.

    Asked if Egypt and other mid-east nations had betrayed him, president Hosni Ibn Obama wavered. “Right now I care about my assets in Switzerland and elsewhere”.
  2. David Guyatt's Avatar
    Dear Tooth,

    Do you believe in fairies?

    Deranged lesbians with outsized thighs? Bulging bras? Wishful thinking old lad. You’ve been reading “Slag’s Abound” again haven’t you. Strange that. I thought it had been taken off the shelves after the last police raid. Perhaps they are handling distribution now to bolster their Plc status.

    It saves taking back-handers I suppose. Not that that stops Rozzerkind from handing them out though. “Satiated but still flogging it” being the undercover force motto.

    But I much enjoyed your commentary as the Gunners romped to victory against the Tractor types at the Stadium of Sheer Magic last evening.

    Your Turkish language broadcast, though a little excitable for my slow digestion and even slower aided hearing technology - was thoroughly enjoyable. Those Taiwanese eh, little blighters, always looking for something new. And Turkish it was last night. And French too. Not to mention Greek.

    Yours in satisfaction

  3. Peter Presland's Avatar
    It's high time the PR (Paul Rigby that is) brand of current affairs satire found a proper home because I for one would rather like to see more of it. It tends to gets lost amid all that discussion hurly burly, so an easily linkable repository makes sense - even though our US cousins are unlikely to make much sense of this one - or others in similar vein for that matter.

    Nevertheless, a good use use for a DPF blog methinks

    More please.