I must read more Marina Hyde

[Peter Presland]

I don't read much MSM these days - just a daily quick scan of about a dozen MSM RSS feeds to see what's exercising them and to stay in touch with 'The Official Narrative" so to speak. In doing so the odd gem occasionally pops up. Here's one such - Very funny and right on the button. The crass, populist-aspiring, infantile, puffed-up, self-rightous stupidity of our leaders in general and our Scottish Tory so-called Defence Minister in particular. Thoroughly deserved satire at its best - God help us.

If Liam Fox can rant over a videogame it's no wonder we're losing the war
Forget the desire to flog burglars – this week the defence secretary surpassed even his own high standards of idiocy

They said it couldn't be done. But in Liam Fox have we finally found the defence secretary to make Geoff Hoon resemble Churchill? A walking Daily Express leader column, Dr Fox appears to have surpassed even his own exacting standards of idiocy this week, by calling for a forthcoming video game set in Afghanistan to be banned.
Though the latest Medal of Honor is essentially a first-person shooter following US troops as they seek to crush the Taliban, players can take the role of the enemy in its multiplayer mode. "It's shocking that someone would think it acceptable to recreate the acts of the Taliban," Fox fumed showily. "I am disgusted and angry. It's hard to believe any citizen of our country would wish to buy such a thoroughly un-British game."
The response from the game's manufacturer is pityingly understated. "Most of us have been doing this since we were seven," it runs. "Someone plays the cop, someone must be the robber. In Medal of Honor multiplayer, someone must be the Taliban."
It's vaguely troubling, isn't it, that the press officer for a games company has an infinitely more rational take on the Afghan war than the secretary of state for defence. In fact, the whole business forces a call to the MoD.
Where does the secretary of state stand on actors playing Taliban in TV dramas, I inquire of a spokeswoman? Is he in favour of retroactive prosecutions for thespians who portrayed Germans in second world war movies? Or is he of the view that despite being subhuman scum, they're so old and frail now they might as well die incognito on their ranches in Argentina, or in actors' benevolent homes on the south coast? Perhaps most pressingly, has Dr Fox got enough to occupy himself with? "He's very busy," comes the affronted retort. "But he wanted to comment on this as it's part of the wider picture of defence."
Hang on – the secretary of state believes a video game is part of the wider defence picture? "Yes, he does." Aha. Are you on the point of seeing why we're losing? Most people would want to be sure that every last terrorist/freedom fighter/cheeky shepherd had been hunted down and captured before the defence secretary started farting out quotes on computer games.
Despite being a Tory, Liam Fox is in many ways an archetypal New Labour character, exhibiting the idiotic knee-jerkery on matters cultural that recalls Beverley Hughes calling Chris Morris's Brass Eye paedophilia special "unspeakably sick" without having seen it. And of course, New Labour never exactly lacked for unappealing rightwing Scots who were rather less bright than they thought they were – though unlike Dr John Reid, erstwhile GP Liam is an actual doctor, as opposed to an eternally insecure former PhD student.
Insecure Dr Fox most certainly is, however – as well he might be. To the toff bosses of David Cameron's Tory party, a GP is something akin to being a domestic servant – the sort of chap to whom you'd give a middling bottle of whisky at Christmas. Not really a friend, but somebody one's obliged to have around to appease the party right, or in case one gets shingles. One might ask him to make up a bridge four if someone had flu, but there'd be no problem reminding him of his place, as when George Osborne slapped down Fox's "freelance" posturing and declared the cost of Trident replacement would come from the MoD budget.
Such lofty dressings-down must rankle, which is presumably why friends of Liam are always talking him up as the leader waiting in the wings should Cameron fail. Yet each time someone puts the words "future leader" in the same sentence as "Liam Fox", I recall a vignette from the year 2000, with the good doctor holding court at a drinks party. "Have you heard my new joke?" he demanded of a group that included journalists. "What do you call three dogs and a blackbird? The Spice Girls!"
This is the level of operator with which we're dealing. When the tale inevitably hit the papers, Liam offered the classically churlish non-apology apology, saying he was sorry "if anyone was offended". And yet, given that it's far from the most racist joke of all time, the real offence of Dr Fox's gag is his being so stupid that he couldn't see how such a thing might sound to other people – rather like poor benighted old Carol Thatcher and her golliwog comment.
Alas, Liam Fox's tragedy is that he's not 5% more stupid than he is – in which case he would be Nicholas Soames, and no one would bother minding. He exists in that most agonising of limbos, being just clever enough to realise he's not quite clever enough.
For such ferociously ambitious lightweights, the endless summer recess is a minefield. Despite notionally having a war with which to occupy himself, the lack of parliamentary structure to his day makes it likely that he will indulge in any number of silly attempts to catch the electorate's eye. It was presumably during another recess in 1998 that Dr Fox made a pronouncement about burglars. "I would like to see these people flogged for their crimes," he explained back then. "People say: 'Who on earth would want to do that?' Well, I would be the first in the queue. These people need a good whacking."
Should the prime minister ever feel strong enough to downgrade Dr Fox, perhaps minister for flogging would be nearer his level?