17-02-2009, 07:11 PM
A sweet little old lady who recently lost her husband decided to purchase a pet to keep her company. She walked down to the local pet store to see all the nice doggies and kitties. They all seemed very nice but the pet that caught her eye was a beautiful red parrot sitting on a perch at the rear of the store.
She found the salesman and inquired about the bird. Oh, lady, you don't want that bird. I bought him from an old sea merchant who has taught that bird every dirty word you can imagine.
The lady didn't budge and decided she could take him home and make a changed bird out of him in no time. Against the advice of the clerk, she happily walked home with her new pet.
They had not been in the house five minutes before the old bird let out a string of profanities a mile long. The little old lady slapped his beak and stuck him in the freezer for five minutes. When she removed him and sat him on his perch he looked at her and said "shit! it's cold in there!
She didn't say a word but smacked him even harder on the beak and placed him back in the freezer for fifteen minutes. When she removed him from the freezer, he sat stiff and stunned for a few minutes. Finally, he looked at the lady and said "dammit are trying to kill me?"
The little lady decided this bird was more stubborn than she had thought and smacked him several times on the beak, snatched him up and threw him back into the freezer. This time she let him remain there for forty five minutes.
This time when she removed him from the freezer, he was stiff, frost covered, shivering and speechless. She was really beginning to worry and just as she was about to rush him to the vet the old bird turned and asked very softly if he could ask just one question. The old lady was so relieved and replied he could ask any question he wanted. His eyes got large, he looked at her and then looked at the freezer and shouted
"WHAT THE HELL DID THAT POOR TURKEY IN THERE SAY?":captain:
She found the salesman and inquired about the bird. Oh, lady, you don't want that bird. I bought him from an old sea merchant who has taught that bird every dirty word you can imagine.
The lady didn't budge and decided she could take him home and make a changed bird out of him in no time. Against the advice of the clerk, she happily walked home with her new pet.
They had not been in the house five minutes before the old bird let out a string of profanities a mile long. The little old lady slapped his beak and stuck him in the freezer for five minutes. When she removed him and sat him on his perch he looked at her and said "shit! it's cold in there!
She didn't say a word but smacked him even harder on the beak and placed him back in the freezer for fifteen minutes. When she removed him from the freezer, he sat stiff and stunned for a few minutes. Finally, he looked at the lady and said "dammit are trying to kill me?"
The little lady decided this bird was more stubborn than she had thought and smacked him several times on the beak, snatched him up and threw him back into the freezer. This time she let him remain there for forty five minutes.
This time when she removed him from the freezer, he was stiff, frost covered, shivering and speechless. She was really beginning to worry and just as she was about to rush him to the vet the old bird turned and asked very softly if he could ask just one question. The old lady was so relieved and replied he could ask any question he wanted. His eyes got large, he looked at her and then looked at the freezer and shouted
"WHAT THE HELL DID THAT POOR TURKEY IN THERE SAY?":captain: