Firstly, apologies are due. For those numerous readers who have asked, the archive for The Clerical Digit can be found under its original name "The Clerical Gnose". The publication changed its name after the readership had complained that they were finding it difficult to pronounce the silent "G".
It now seems appropriate, since he tone has now been dropped, to turn to the discussion of spanking, spanking garments, spanking memorabilia and stamp spanking, aka' the collecting of spanked impressions - much like Philately but without the need for an affixing glue.
And I will post more on this after having taken breakfast when my stomach has been fortified.
PS, I defy anyone to now find a spanked picture of Max Moseley! All have gone the way of the silent "G".
The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge.
Many a visitor will be from other sides of the flagellated bottom -- for chastisement is a cross-bench (not so say cross-knee) occupation.
I fully expect readers from such notable journals as the "Well Bruised Organ", the "Socialist Spanker" as well as its Communist Counterpart "Red Weal" to be well represented here as well --- not to mention those whose preference is up the middle: "The Liberal Love Buddy", "The Cymru Chastiser" and the Green Party bi-annual (printed on renewable recycled tree shavings) "The Galloping Goitre".
The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge.
Many a visitor will be from other sides of the flagellated bottom -- for chastisement is a cross-bench (not so say cross-knee) occupation.
I fully expect readers from such notable journals as the "Well Bruised Organ", the "Socialist Spanker" as well as its Communist Counterpart "Red Weal" to be well represented here as well --- not to mention those whose preference is up the middle: "The Liberal Love Buddy", "The Cymru Chastiser" and the Green Party bi-annual (printed on renewable recycled tree shavings) "The Galloping Goitre".
I had quite forgotten the Lib Dems. Strange bunch, though no strangers, of course, to scandal, corruption and the chafed posterior. I take it the reference to that well-known organ of Gladstonian high-mindedness, The Liberal Love Buddy, is most emphatically not a nod in the direction of Rinka et Norman?
12-04-2010, 08:59 AM (This post was last modified: 12-04-2010, 09:04 AM by David Guyatt.)
Paul Rigby Wrote:
David Guyatt Wrote:Not so fast.
Many a visitor will be from other sides of the flagellated bottom -- for chastisement is a cross-bench (not so say cross-knee) occupation.
I fully expect readers from such notable journals as the "Well Bruised Organ", the "Socialist Spanker" as well as its Communist Counterpart "Red Weal" to be well represented here as well --- not to mention those whose preference is up the middle: "The Liberal Love Buddy", "The Cymru Chastiser" and the Green Party bi-annual (printed on renewable recycled tree shavings) "The Galloping Goitre".
I had quite forgotten the Lib Dems. Strange bunch, though no strangers, of course, to scandal, corruption and the chafed posterior. I take it the reference to that well-known organ of Gladstonian high-mindedness, The Liberal Love Buddy, is most emphatically not a nod in the direction of Rinka et Norman?
Sorry, but whilst I'm quite easy going (so I'm told anyway), bringing Great Dane canines into the proceedings is one bark too many in my view. But I do take your point about Liberal Love Buddies and vividly remember their abundant Chief Whip (I kid you not!) and spanker-in-chief from Rochdale, Cyril Smith, who was famous in Lancashire and Westminster for his flat palm of the hand exploits.
The below picture is called "Cyril's healing hands" - more HERE.
Btw, Peter Cook is sadly missed.
The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge.
Many a visitor will be from other sides of the flagellated bottom -- for chastisement is a cross-bench (not so say cross-knee) occupation.
I fully expect readers from such notable journals as the "Well Bruised Organ", the "Socialist Spanker" as well as its Communist Counterpart "Red Weal" to be well represented here as well --- not to mention those whose preference is up the middle: "The Liberal Love Buddy", "The Cymru Chastiser" and the Green Party bi-annual (printed on renewable recycled tree shavings) "The Galloping Goitre".
I had quite forgotten the Lib Dems. Strange bunch, though no strangers, of course, to scandal, corruption and the chafed posterior. I take it the reference to that well-known organ of Gladstonian high-mindedness, The Liberal Love Buddy, is most emphatically not a nod in the direction of Rinka et Norman?
Sorry, but whilst I'm quite easy going (so I'm told anyway), bringing Great Dane canines into the proceedings is one bark too many in my view. But I do take your point about Liberal Love Buddies and vividly remember their abundant Chief Whip (I kid you not!) and spanker-in-chief from Rochdale, Cyril Smith, who was famous in Lancashire and Westminster for his flat palm of the hand exploits.
The below picture is called "Cyril's healing hands" - more HERE.
Btw, Peter Cook is sadly missed.
Oh, I thought it all this was about Cocker Spankers not Great Danes?
"The philosophers have only interpreted the world, in various ways. The point, however, is to change it." Karl Marx
"He would, wouldn't he?" Mandy Rice-Davies. When asked in court whether she knew that Lord Astor had denied having sex with her.
“I think it would be a good idea” Ghandi, when asked about Western Civilisation.
Magda Hassan Wrote:Oh, I thought it all this was about Cocker Spankers not Great Danes?
To the Editor, The Daily Torygraph, May 1979:
As the acclaimed author of Northern Roots: A History of Liverpool Dentistry, quite probably the definitive self-published tome on the subject, I trust no one will gainsay my right to indulge what Sigmund Feud ludicrously characterized as "the narcissism of small differences"?
"Cocker spankers" was not a reference to a breed of Tory dog, as your ill-informed columnist Ferdinand Mount absurdly insisted, but instead an historical manifestation of working-class Victorian pain relief, as pioneered in West Yorkshire in the mid-1870s.
Unable to ply temperance tooth sufferers with gin, lateral-thinking Tyke barbours had recourse to the old principle of pain distraction; and employed pugnacious midgets to administer a vigorous uppercut to the groin upon the trigger phrase, "All right, Cocker, sit thee down..."
I learned of this remarkable example of Victorian proletarian improvisation in the course of my many conversations with Lex Mackem Solicitors, whose intervention into my researches into the activities of Sean McCavity, the saintly dentist to the poor whom I had mistakenly styled "The White Coated Groper of Scotland Road" in the first edition of Northern Roots, corrected an egregious error.
I remain, Sir, an otherwise admiring observer of your organ,
The Scottish dentist practice to which you refer are misnamed. As I suspect you very well know.
You are referring to Messrs Ben Doon and Phil McCavity, who were the Orthodontists to the stars. I say "were" and not "are" for the very good reason that they had their license withdrawn by the Royal School of Dental Franchises (RSDF) following numerous complaints from female patients for their incorrect and, indeed, lascivious use of dental mirrors as well as engaging in unauthorized oral operations.
Unable to make a further living in oral care, Ben Doon became a dog breeder and specialized in the Affenpinscher - for which he was later imprisoned under Section B of the cruelty to Dogs Act. He later moved to Spain and bred Basenji's as guard dogs - a business that was bound to fail. And did.
Meanwhile, McCavity moved to Russia where he became a plumber to the Tsars and now lives in an 11 Bedroom, 5 Reception room Dacha in the Black Sea resort of Sochi.
The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge.
According to the testimony of Maurice De Vere Gamp, the whistle-blowing former British diplomat expelled from St Petersburg in 1996 for possession of a radioactive undergarment – plus a shaved Borzoi - in a public place, McCavity’s plumbing service was a cover story for a deep penetration/psy-ops project on behalf of the occupants of the Thames-side Babylonian Palace.
In Gamp’s somewhat bizarre memoir, Specialised Services in Modern Russia: Of Hookers, Dentists and Shrinks (London: Anthony Gland, 2001), he claims that McCavity was sent to Russia by SIS for the express purpose of spreading sexual panic among Moscow’s new ruling elite.
McCavity’s state-of-the-art “dental practice” – a phrase guaranteed to inspire dread in reputable oral hygiene establishment’s across the globe – was the means by which he was insinuated into Muscovite high society, and, once established there, began spreading rumours of an epidemic of vagina dentata among the many ravishing young wives of the city’s burgeoning business titans.
SIS sought to exploit the resultant panic by the provision of a dating service and a psychiatric practice, both of which were, of course, Sissy fronts. The entire scheme collapsed in ignominy when a tired and emotional McCavity arrived late one night for an emergency appointment and solemnly informed a startled Hilary Clinton that she had been suffering an infected lateral incisor “down below,” but that he had operated successfully – and thrown in a full Brazilian for free.
Gamp’s ancestral seat, the Somerset town of Goosed-super-mare, was subject, by turns, to the depredations of a serial killer (Broadmoor escapee Leonard Cook aka the Cooky Monster); a deranged lone gunman (postman Furze Shagwell); and, last but by no means least, a vacuum bomb mistakenly unleashed by a passing overhead member of the USAF. Both elderly Waugh sisters perished in the latter, a crime from which, according to Christopher Hitchens, British literature has yet to recover.
Gamp, meanwhile, found himself wandering the streets of a wintry St Petersburg early morning armed only with a radioactive thong, a vacant expression, and a scalped mutt. The psychiatrist concerned, Ms Beatrice Nightingale, later fell victim to an exploding “Rabbit” in a Rotterdam hotel. The final insult came when Gamp learned that the call-girl ring he thought he was running turned out to have been under FSB control all along.
This cautionary tale - why we should never mix espionage with oral relief - comprises an entirely new chapter in the updated version of Northern Roots, which I am delighted to reveal will be published by Gland in November 2013.
